I watched you drive away today.
I felt my fingers tingle.
Just so you know … I see the look in your eye when you talk to me. I know how you still feel.
Everything is fine. I’m doing OK.
Something inside me is screaming. I’m running circles in my mind. No self soothing mechanisms work.
The room is spinning and everyone is talking and people are laughing and I can’t recognize any of it.
My head isn’t on straight.
Hasn’t been for almost a year.
I can’t hide forever. And I don’t do fake.
I am me.
I am here.
I am alive … and I’m dying.